: Name: ~dreamer~; Location: Hong Kong

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Dance like no one is watching...

...love like you'll never be hurt...

...sing like no one is listening...

...live like it's heaven on earth.

Life is beautiful!

.: wishlist :.
tix to Alicia Keys concert
new digital camera
new phone (pda)
more office clothes
~~new bikini :)~~
more shoes
plane ticket to manila
carebear stuffed toy
~~big black bag~~

.: previous posts :.

.: archives :.
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
March 2005
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
May 2008
June 2008

.: friends :.
marcus
piggy wing
chi-licious
becks
gloria
l.a.
chuckles
gengkukay
pretty zara
mai crabbedstar
ryeness
the goddess
astron's notebook
empress maruja
fei flora
magoo

.: thanks :.
blogger
blogskins
designer

What have you got to say?

Monday, June 02, 2008

alone.

4 days and counting...still no form of any communication from him. how can he leave me hanging like this? doesn't he even care at all?

i just realized this afternoon, i'm back in the same fucking situation i was in almost a year ago...feeling confused and alone. the only difference is i have a job now that would help me "distract" myself from thinking of my problems with him. but another problem is...i can't even fucking focus at work. i can honestly say that there's not one minute that passes by that i don't think about him.

what am i thinking about?

is he really helping his friend in china? fuck, i miss him! does that text from his ex-girlfriend really don't mean anything? i would give anything just to be able to talk to him. did he lie to me? i wish he'd come back soon and i'll be the first person he looks for. is this his way of telling me that it's over? then there will only be one word to describe him: ASSHOLE!

i want to cry. but there aren't any tears coming out. i'm mad. i want to scream. but i am not at the right time and place to do that.

i'm mad. i'm sad. i'm disappointed. i'm furious. i'm restless. i'm depressed. i'm inconsolable. i'm annoyed. i'm alone and imploding bit by bit with everyday that passes by that i haven't heard a word from him.

i fucking hate this feeling. i wish i could just sleep and wake up to a bright and sunny day with all these buried in the past. then i would be happy and contented. i'd give anything for that.

- posted by ~dreamer~ @ 11:11 PM

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